nephely

It's been twelve years since I registered here. This account is the oldest proof of my existence in the internet :D And it means a lot, even though I have been visiting less and less for the past couple of years. I've just ended a 1,5 month opioid binge, first one after over two years break. I have a job now, one that I like a lot. I couldn't imagine finding something like this two years ago, and now I have it, and it requires physical strength (I'm a cook) and I can't afford... It doesn't matter anyway. I decided to go with the flow and do whatever I think is right at the moment. It's not perfect -yet-, but at least I feel I'm alive. Also

Loneliest birthday ever. My best friend moved to a city about two hundred km from here, I deleted my facebook account so no wishes from there, and I didn't tell any of my new accquaintances because... hell knows why. I only had the morning and early afternoon for myself, then went to work, and my mother picked me up after midnight. I guess that was what really made me sad. I'd usually had a little get-together with my family on birthdays and yesterday I couldn't, so I just went on with it on my own. Five sparkly candles put into fruit pancakes and a wish that most likely won't ever come true. Sometimes it's just hard to be so closed up, spen

...hope for the best. I got two jobs at once and have very little time for myself. I miss drawing, but I need physical exhaustion right now. And working in both those places is nice.